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Workplace

Cubicle Love: The 2001 Vault Office Romance Survey Analysis

"I gave at the office," takes on a whole new meaning with the results of Vault's Office Romance Survey. Nearly 50 percent of all respondents say they have been involved in an office romance.

It's no secret that today's office is a hotbed for romance. As one employer explains, "When you work with hundreds of young, talented, energetic people, it's bound to happen." And with workweeks routinely stretching beyond 50 hours a week, employees have less time to look outside the office.

An interesting finding is that more employers (i.e., managers) than employees, at 58 and 44 percent, respectively, report that they've had office romances.

Of those respondents who haven't yet had an office romance, many express a willingness to explore: 34 percent of employees and 20 percent of employers say that although they haven't had an office romance, they'd certainly be willing. 22 percent of employees and employers are "all business," reporting that they've never had an office romance and aren't particularly willing to start one.

Keep it undercover

Although some of you like to kiss and tell, most kiss and keep quiet. The majority of office romances (40 percent) are kept between the amorous duo and a few select pals (or so they think.) 24 percent say (or hope) that no one knew about their romance, and 20 percent say they didn't tell anyone but, curiously, everyone knew anyway.

Fallout

More than half of total respondents say there were no repercussions for having an office romance, and 29 percent of employees and 24 percent of employees say they established a long term relationship or got married.

The repercussions of office romance are a varied lot. Some say their office romance was distracting - "difficult to concentrate because he sat two cubicles away" - while others enjoyed the "thrill of secrecy."

But things could be worse, and for some, they are. One respondent reports having been fired and another says his wife found out and consequently "spoke to the other woman."

One respondent doesn't know what all the fuss is about and offers this tip: "Never date a coworker when you can date all their friends. The math is better."

~ There are spies among us

Whether trying to enforce office policy or enjoy a vicarious thrill, managers have a vested interest in finding out about workplace entanglements. Employers relate their methods of discovery.

The majority, at 44 percent, say a "little birdie told them." 28 percent say the couple were completely upfront about it, thus no need for secret sleuthing. Another 27 percent have caught offenders red-handed and 26 percent have never discovered an office romance.

For those who have told a few friends, watch out - one of them might be the office mole: 16 percent of employers say a coworker has actually ratted the couple out. And finally, a particularly intrusive 2 percent of employers say they have monitored the emails and phones of suspect employees. But sometimes employers don't even have to do their own dirty work. One accounts-payable employee inadvertently discovered a certain female employee's phone number on teh boss's cell phone bill, multiple times, every day, every hour. (Sounds more like a stalker than an office romance to us...)

How do employers handle office romances in their midst? More than half (52 percent) would do nothing and 37 percent would monitor the employees to ensure work is not compromised. 16 percent would discuss the situation with the involved parties and a minimal 2 percent would make both sign a consensual relationship agreement, presumably to avoid sexual harassment charges in the event of a breakup.

Um? guys?

Motels must be seeing a dip in business, because 39 percent of employees admit to having engaged in physical affection at the office.

Of those claiming to have taken workplace teamwork to a whole new level, the most popular locales for such team-building encounters are desks (39 percent) or in the conference room (35 percent). Seventeen percent admit to bathroom lovin'.

We can't believe you admit to this

So much for discretion. A surprising 16 percent of employers say they have caught someone in the midst of an office tryst, and 8 percent of employees admit to having been caught in a compromising position. One employer walked in mid-tryst and looked the manager straight in the eye as he tried to talk about some business related issue. Another walked in on a couple who were "too busy to notice me."

Who wrote the employee handbook of love?

All this talk about office hanky-panky brings up the question of protocol.

Most companies do not have a fast and hard rule, according to our survey: 88 percent of respondents report that either their company does not have an office romance policy or that they don't know whether it does or not.

Among those who are aware of any guidelines, the most common policy is that bosses cannot date people who report to them.

What's acceptable?

Not all office romances are created equal. The majority of respondents, 55 percent, think it is unacceptable for a manager to date a subordinate. Not surprisingly, more employers, (64 percent), than employees, (52 percent), agree with that statement. Other unacceptable romances, according to our respondents: dating an intern (which 32 percent of managers and 30 percent of employees thought wrong), an employee dating someone in HR (at 17 percent for managers and 15 percent for managers) and dating the son or daughter of the boss (22 percent of employers.)

In a slightly ironic twist, more employers than employees, at 23 and16 percent respectively, say office romances are always acceptable. Of course, that goes firmly in hand with our results that show more employers than employees have had romantic liaisons with a coworker.

Industry standard?

As to which industries garner the highest rate of cubicle canoodling, employers and employees are mostly in agreement. The majority, at 39 percent, think "media/entertainment" has the most office romance, with sister industry "advertising/marketing" taking the door prize at 19 percent.

~ Try it, you'll like it

Those who have successfully rendezvoused sing its praises. "It makes going to work worthwhile" says one while another muses, "paradise and my husband found."

My job "was like a little love boat," says one respondent. "There were tons of people in their 20s and early 30s, so many of us dated other employees."

Here's a mostly happily-ever-after instance. One respondent says his office romance produced a 22 year marriage (he has since divorced) and "two great kids."

But despite some glowing reports, others say "never again."

"The gossips were in talk heaven," says one respondent, while another laments "coworkers viewed us differently." One employer recalls a boss who cautioned against dating a coworker, likening it to "dipping into the till."

Tell us how you really feel

Some of you have very definite opinions about workplace dating. Attitudes run the gamut from "office romance is wrong" to "people should date whoever the hell they want to date." One multi-tasker even boasts, "both my husband and my boyfriend are office romances." Still, others say "not for the faint of heart" and "don't do it, it can only lead to trouble."

But the majority lie somewhere in the middle, decreeing that dating a coworker is no big deal, so long as it's handled with prudence.

"The only time it's unacceptable," says one respondent, "is when it is used in office politics as a means of obtaining power."

"As long as it doesn't involve married people," adds another, "I see no problems with it."

Moralists, take heart. At least one respondent didn't check his scruples at the door: "I've been approached by a coworker but chose not to pursue it. I didn't want to risk my happy home life." Happy Valentine's Day!

Saturday, November 07, 2009
7:26 PM

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