| Last month's column talked about the basics of networking. We discussed identifying the people in your network and how to approach them. We also covered effective listening and dealing with rejection.
So did you try any of it out? I hope you did, because the only way to improve your networking ability is to network. Practice won't make perfect, but it will make progress. It may not be any easier to pick up the phone to make a call, but each time you get a little smoother with your pitch. Assuming that you've mastered the fundamentals (or not), it's time to move on to the advanced level.
Making the Most of Group Situations
So far, most of the tactics have been designed for a one-on-one experience, either in person (most desirable) or over the phone. But opportunities for networking in groups are equally important, and, in fact, can be a valuable prelude to that individual opportunity. Here's how:
Find an appropriate gathering and get yourself there. Technology user groups are great, as are business associations, professional organizations, and PTA meetings, for that matter. But plan your strategy ahead of time. Give some thought to the kinds of people you'll be likely to meet there, and prepare yourself by doing a little research. For example, arm yourself with a couple of good questions about user interface design if you're going to a web designers' group.
Arriving early lets you catch some people before the program starts. Take a deep breath and walk right up to a stranger and introduce yourself. Saying that you're new is a great way to break the ice and leads right into the next question, "what do you think of the group?" It doesn't even matter if the other person is a newbie too, because then the two of you get to bond and conversation can move along.
Your goal is to establish some rapport with new people. It's not to exchange a few pleasantries and launch right into a speech about your need for a job. You want to find out about what folks do and what companies they do it for. If the conversation comes around to an opportunity to say that you're in job search mode, you can mention it, but that's it.
Make sure not to push yourself during this first contact. In fact, don't even bring your resume with you. Much better to take someone's card, so you can send the resume and then set up a meeting later. You can take it from there.
The real trick in group networking is managing time. Most group gatherings set aside a given period for interaction and you want to make the most of it. This doesn't mean that you approach the situation like it's some form of speed dating, but you do ration your time and attention carefully.
Don't be afraid to disengage if the conversation is going nowhere. Your aim is to zero in on some people who can help you, not be a captive audience. Wait until there's a break in the action, tell the person that you enjoyed talking and excuse yourself and move to another part of the room. Practice hovering near small groups of people and insinuating yourself into ongoing conversations.
Always be polite. Stay low-key and don't interrupt. Listen for the undertone of the conversation. If it sounds like the participants know each other well and are having more than a superficial discussion, move along and find another group. Don't participate in group arguments - it's unlikely that they'll ever lead to effective networking opportunities.
Above all, be sensitive to non-verbal clues from the people you talk to. You don't want to monopolize their time either, so watch for behaviors like shifting weight from side to side, looking around, glancing at a clock, etc. Apologize for being so caught up and ask if it would be all right to continue the discussion off line. That's the time to get a card and even make an appointment, if you can. Your sensitivity will be appreciated, which should help you continue this budding relationship. And that's important because …
Networking is a Process
Not a "one and done" activity. You don't do it for two weeks at the beginning and then stop, nor do you save it for use after other methods haven't worked. It's something you do throughout the job search … and if you're smart, before and after too.
When you see networking as an ongoing activity, you avoid feeling like you're using people or being a pain. Each contact can be seen as the "beginning of a beautiful friendship," instead of the cause of stomach spasms. When we dissect fear of, or resistance to networking, the usual root cause is not wanting to ask for help.
The problem is in the perception - our perception. How we perceive ourselves and how we interpret the perceptions of others. It's a strength and power thing. So often, we think that asking for help makes us look needy or weak. Wrong.
Asking for help is an asset. It shows effective problem solving, by demonstrating that we recognize our own limitations. That we're focusing on the goal rather than on ourselves and that we have the strength of character to know that we don't have to be Lone Rangers.
Remember that processes are cyclical … what goes around, comes around. This means that sometimes you take from your network, and sometimes you give. There will be opportunities for you to be the networkee, rather than the networker you are right now. Don't obsess about payback or keeping score. It all works out eventually.
Network Maintenance
Think of your network as a garden. It needs a design and a plan, some hard work in the beginning to get it going, and periodic tending. You can plant it, wait for rain and hope for the best. Or, you can water regularly, weed, and prune judiciously. Your harvest is sure to depend on your the level of effort and (snarky comment alert) choice of fertilizer.
Dispensing with the metaphor, here are a few easy to follow instructions:
- Stay in touch. Contact people regularly, even if it's just to say hi.
- Be the source of good news having nothing to do with you and share it generously. Be miserly with bad news and malicious gossip.
- Electronic communication is great, but face time counts. Get out and see people in the flesh.
- Be lavish with your appreciation for the time and attention of others and modest. Be liberal with the gift of your own time and attention.
- When in job search mode, set weekly networking goals for yourself. Follow up and keep good records so that you can follow up some more.
A Couple of Not-So-Obvious Networking Hints
When putting together your list of contacts for networking, don't forget about the folks who provide you with personal services, like your hairdresser, physician, lawyer, or drycleaner. You never know who may be able to identify someone who works in one of the companies you've targeted through your research.
If you're a college graduate, don't overlook the value of alumni associations and publications. Read through the class notices to see who's announcing a new job at a company you're interested in. There are very few people who won't respond to a note of congratulations with a request for information from an alum of the old alma mater.
It can be hard to network when you're just starting out as a techie. Most of your acquaintances are probably going to be close to your level and not much help, despite their best intentions. A great idea is to plan an evening out with your buddies and have them invite their boss or someone else they know in a position of authority. It's just a couple of beers and you get to make valuable contacts while keeping it light.
More
Indicators are beginning to point to some loosening in the tight labor market. Hang in if you're out of work. Better days are coming. If you need a place to vent or a shoulder to cry on, write to me at jamie@jobcircle.com. Next month, New Salary Realities.
Enjoy this article? Read more of JobCircle.com's Career Coach articles.
Jamie Fabian spent more than 15 years as a human resources executive before changing careers to become a senior project manager for a growing IT consulting company. Now in management consulting for a large Pharma company, Jamie would like to be seen as a hybrid of Tom Peters, Tom Jackson, and Tom Wolfe, but spends too much time working, driving carpool and watching mindless TV to write more than this column. You can contact Jamie with questions and comments at jamie@jobcircle.com.
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